Consenting to Be Loved by a Holy God

Whom have I in heaven but You?          And besides You, I desire nothing on earth.     My flesh and my heart may fail,          But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Psalm 73: 25-26 My dear Sisters and Brothers in the LORD, greetings in Jesus Name, Through out time and eternity God is and has been and will be Sovereign over our circumstances and He alone can redeem every difficulty, every failure and every tear, for our good and His glory.  These words are living truth not platitudes!  Great are His purposes because He is great. Shall the wrath of man not praise Him and serve His will? Shall He neglect to comfort and transform? He has said, "All things".   All things serve Him... Psalm 119:91 niv I struggle to include my sin and failures under this divine umbrella. So many times i fail to live a surrendered life and am less than He saved me to be! Am I quick to weep over my fleshly ways? Am i  quick to learn from what God has permitted, quick to receive all He wants to teach me? As i abide in Him, do I praise Him in faith because I truly believe 'no affliction can reach me without His permission' and that He has permitted it for my own best interest? Am I quick to focus on Jesus?  I would love to shout a resounding "Yes!" but it is so easy to live by feelings missing an opportunity to prove Him faithful. That alone should cause me to weep.  "All that we pass through is that we may get a fresh view of the Lord Jesus, or a deepening of a former one; but often we are so occupied with ourselves and the circumstances, that we fail to 'behold the glory of the Lord." C.T. In our failure and rebellion (choosing our own will over His) and in disappointment, instead of humbly learning our Father's grace we naturally try and improve ourselves! The flesh avoids the cross at all costs and humbling ourself is dying to self. We soon forget that to be disappointed in ourselves is to have trusted in ourselves. We need to realize two 'source' truths:  1.The Lord Jesus is the source of my Christian life and I am complete in Him, I am a new creations in Him II Cor 5:7. Read this sentence again and hear it....   2. We are to appropriate this fact by faith and are brought into the practical reality of it day by day in our experience. He is the living Word and gave us His Word. To believe this changes everything. The scripture does not teach us to focus on our sins, our growth or sanctification, not on love, hope, or experiences; we are to focus on Jesus alone. Growth is progressing in spiritual knowledge of what we actually possess from the outset.  Since we are complete in our Lord we are not to try and add to that finished work. It is now a matter of walking by faith and receiving or appropriating from the ever-abundant source within. mjs I need reminding again and again that my part is not production but reception of my new life in Christ. This means Bible based, fact finding, faith in Him; trusting Him to work His purposes in my life, even when it makes no sense. Will you trust along with me (faith choice) that He is taking us through the necessary process to create in us the likeness of His precious Son?  I read these words in Acts 4:13  When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.  i heard Jesus question ordinary me: 'Has anyone recently been astonished at my Presence in you?' How could it be otherwise if I am abiding and beholding Him? Tears of regret are so often tears which side-track us and plunge us into self-pity. To learn grace is to expect to be blessed, though realizing more and more lack of worth. To believe and consent to be loved  while unworthy is the great secret. And to hope to be better (hence acceptable) is to fail to see yourself in Christ only. WRN  Refuse unbelief and see yourself as God sees you, in Christ.  To you (alone), O LORD I lift up my soul; in You I trust, O my God. Show me your ways... teach me your paths; guide me... for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in You all day long. Psalm 25:1,4-5      He is the Source of every grace, all mercy needed. His word lives and is the greatest source of Truth. Allow Him to live through you in obedience to His word. His patience and love, His peace, His strength, His joy, His wisdom, His power, His resurrection life, His fruit through you, transforming you, and astonishing others. O Love, that has no beginning, You who hung the world on nothing, i run to You! You who have loved me from eternity past, who after giving absolutely everything, You gave Yourself! i come to the God who pursued me even to the depths of my lostness where my sins had subdued me, taking the form of a slave to set me free from slavery to my sin. You died a torturous death to cleanse me from all sin. i run to You, hear my cry, 'change me!'  Forgive me for running from You, for refusing so many times the love You offer. i am worthy to be an outcast from Your Presence. Free me from trying to live in such a way as to give You cause to love me; for You are love that knows no end. You are the love that my sins could never quench. Such love terrifies me and i long to know you intimately and follow, taking up my cross, denying myself by faith. You are life and breath and I love you and invite You to cleanse and fill me.  Teach me to behold You in all Your glory. thank You i am in Christ. Praise Jesus, amen In the Love that was independent of all I am, az

Appalled!

"...worship God in the Spirit, rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh" Phil 3:3-4


My Brother and Sisters who love the Lord,


Appalled! Why am I not more so? Exhausted from days of emotional struggle! Times when God seems to step back, allowing the battle (which is the Lord's) to be oppressive. Understanding His methods is not my priority but the cry of my heart is ,"Lord, teach me all you want me to learn in this! It hurts Lord."  His most precious lessons are those which move my heart to deeper dependence on Him; thereby proving Him faithful which is the fore front of His loving purposes. I am slow to learn and like the Jews in the wilderness who turned a 9-day journey into 40 years of travel, God repeats a lesson over and again until i finally 'get it'. 


One of the most difficult lessons for a believer has to do with the true condition of man. Our flesh. If we have been Christians for a while we are aware of the struggle we have with sin.  We often work to hide our failures and weaknesses from others wanting them to think we are spiritual and doing great. The enemy loves this redundant, prideful behavior as it gives him a foot in the door!


 Why are we not more willing to face up to the truth of our despicable, incorrigible sin-nature? We are not uninformed in scripture nor do we lack experience of trying hard to live the Christian life and falling far short. God intentionally made the Christian life impossible to live; so we would run to Him, "Lord, i can't do this. Help!" It is our pride that desires to have some part in our salvation. But that would negate grace and become 'works'.


For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; Romans 7:18


As long as we look and hope for something good in ourselves we are walking in the flesh. We can teach and preach and do acts of kindness in the flesh; but the Truth is none of it is eternal. Only what the Spirit does through us is eternal. God has one plan for the old sin nature... death.  We are crucified with Christ. This alone can stop the cycle of sin. We think God should make us strong, but He makes us weak that we might be totally dependent on His strength which is made perfect in our weakness. (II Cor 12:9) But like manna, it is daily. We need to believe we have the nature of a sinner or we will not surrender to Him and appropriate all Christ did for us on the Cross to break the power and bondage of sin over us. 


This prayer expresses my heart beat....
How blessed is my lack of ability, because it makes me find in You everything that is lacking in me! F.F.


God's Truth will lift you higher and hold you above all that would pull you down even when if 'feels' like you are not going to be able to stand a minute longer. Oh to learn early not live by feelings but walk by faith. (II Cor 5:7) Today let these four words bathe you: "I am 'in' Christ." Take them with you. Repeat them until they sink deep in your spirit. You are in Christ and His Victory cannot be earned, it is yours by right as His child. (if you know Him personally having repented of your sins, receiving forgiveness because you believe Christ's death was for you. 


The blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin I John 1:7) 


We may seek and receive forgiveness, but then we sin again; and life goes on in a vicious cycle- sinning and being forgiven, but then sinning again. We appreciate God's forgiveness, but we want deliverance. We need forgiveness for what we have done, but we need deliverance from what we are. mjs


How greatly we need a renewed mind. Most of us grow up with a wrong mindset; unaware Satan's greatest point of attack is in our thinking, by planting fears, doubts, unclean thoughts, jealousies, fantasies and lies; then accuses us of thinking them! When we accept his lies as our own thoughts, he gains a foothold in our lives which can develop into a stronghold. We are instructed in I John to test our thoughts. Renewing our mind in His word is absolutely key to 'be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might.' Eph 6:10


Victorious Father, Giver of all that is good, You who cleansed me from all sin with Your shed blood, I come exhausted from the battle. Thank You for hearing my prayers and though I did not 'feel' Your Presence, it did not change the Truth of it. Thank You for being a God who loves, corrects, disciplines, and works Your great purposes in my life. Thank You for keeping the pressure on when I cry out for relief, because You are not working for my happiness but my holiness. In the end the sweetness of You is worth all the tears and struggle. You are my exceeding and great reward. Who else could redeem our struggles and pain and trials? There is no God but You. You are the One who sets my feet to dancing and lifts me up. It is You who took my shame and gave me Your name,,,,, 'I declare I am a child of the King of kings and LORD of Lords.' I declare He is faithful and His promises are true. I declare this moment You are Lord over the painful relationships in my life, over the disappointments and failures. I declare the greatness of Your grace and mercy and love for me and for all who take time to read this. I pray You are drawing them to Yourself in ways beyond my ability to pray. Do wondrous things for I declare You are a Wondrous and Awesome God. I love You so.... and as always i am so blessed to kneel and pray in the Name above all names, in Jesus my Savior.


Failure is necessary for growth and then clearly He will receive the glory for any success. You are loved by the King of kings my brother, my sister,


az

Teach me to give You Thanks LORD!

In everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Fellow Believers in Yeshua, the Lamb of God, who is living Truth, worthy of all praise and thanksgiving,

This verse is likely one you memorized as a child if you were blessed to be raised in the faith. I ask you to read it again slowly and meditatively. Separate each word as you speak it aloud and pause. Hear what you are saying. What questions pop to the surface? Knowing this Truth why do we mutely treat it as though it were designed to be shelved along side a good book we plan to read some day? Are we not to eat His word, digesting it so it becomes part of us? 

The first word is: 'In'... not beside, or following or previously to... but 'in'.  Like swimming. Not beside the water or near the water or on the dock but in for the swim. Wet with Truth that oozes out of our pores, drenching us and refreshing those around us. His word is to become sinews and muscle and movement and energy.  'Everything'. Not some things, or what we would chose or that which tickles our fancy or suits us at the moment, but the painful, trying, prickly, disappointing losses, all we would avoid like a snake bite. 'Give'. A choice of our wills. A surrender. To willingly give. Whether we feel like praising or not. 'Thanks'. Choosing to be thankful even if you do not feel like it. Not so easy for a society that commonly operates at this fleshly level. 'For'... because it is 'God's will for you'. Followed by the expository phrase 'in Christ Jesus'. Do we really need any more reason than that we are "in" Christ and it is our Savior's will for us? He who purchased us with His own blood lived these very words. Let's eavesdrop in the garden of Gethsemane: 

Jesus knelt down and began to pray saying, "Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done." Luke 22:411

I have questions... what is to be foundation for my gratefulness? Am i to be grateful because others are worse off than me and i feel guilty? Their pain is greater, their loss is larger, their struggle paralyzing? Am i to be filled with gratefulness because i have a lot of stuff? Have you heard someone say, "I am so thankful after seeing video of the earthquake and Tsunami in Japan and the deadly tornado in Southern United States." This is dysfunctional thinking. 'I am thankful it wasn't me' is not a reflection of the grateful spirit i am commanded to exercise daily; irregardless of my circumstances. Such things can open my eyes to see how blessed i am to be given abundant provision for my need and i should give thanks... it is part of the 'everything'. But the reason is not found in the rubble or in the blessings. It is found in Christ Jesus. Period. Who I am 'in' Christ Jesus gives me everything needed to shout, to sing, to dance in praise to my Heavenly King, my Fountain of Living Water... my Abba.

I am encouraged to go beyond 'birth' Truths and move on to 'growth' Truths. Calvary is the secret of it all. It is what He did there that counts, and what  He did becomes a force in my life when i appropriate it by faith. This is the starting point at which all Godly living must take its rise. MJS

O give thanks to the LORD, for He is good; For His loving-kindness is everlasting.  1 Chronicles 16:34

As we daily take up our cross, denying ourselves and follow Him we will be thankful. Because as we count ourselves dead to sin, the flesh and the world, we will experience Christ living through us. We cannot come to Him and find acceptance for anything we have done in our strength, our flesh. He can only accept that which is from His Son. Not even our thanksgiving is acceptable unless it is the fruit of His life in and through us. Hear me dear ones! Most of the church spends their energy trying to please God without a clue they are living by there own efforts. Finally the insidious failure overwhelms and they fall on their face before Him. They must learn to died to self (Romans 6-7) applying the Truth that they are crucified with Him.  Hear me. Our best is not acceptable to Him. Only the perfect Lamb of God can bring that which is acceptable to a Holy God. It is the divine way. Trust Him to live through you. We need to humble our self and admit our failure to be grateful is because we have built a foundation on a temporary footing rather than the unchanging victorious, Holy  Son of God. 

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. II Cor 4:18

Hear these scriptures and ask: 'Why should I give thanks to the  LORD?' What do they tell us? Believing truth will produce a thankful spirit in us, glorifying the Lord.

I will give thanks to the LORD because of his righteousness; I will sing the praises of the name of the LORD Most High. Psalm 7:17

O give thanks to the LORD, for He is good; For His loving-kindness is everlasting. 1 Chronicles 16:34

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever. Psalm 107:1

Unchanging One, You who hold my every breath, You who are never surprised by my failure to be grateful, You are the fountain of Living Water supplying my every need... You have placed me in Christ and I am in awe of You...  i bow, i worship. You are so beautiful. Give me understanding as i read Your word and create a ravenous hunger for You. Change me! Cleanse me from all my fleshly-efforts to please You; teaching me to rest in the power of Your Holy Spirit, that i might please You today, O Lord, You know i long to please you always. By Your Spirit enable me to give thanks in everything, not for everything, but You are worthy to be praised always and forever. I can give thanks that You redeem everything and turn it to serve Your purposes...  there is no God but You! Blessed be the Name of Adoni. amen 

You are loved immeasurably.... give thanks to Him!

az

Wounding His Heart of Love

All you who fear the Lord, trust the Lord! He is your helper and your shield.  The Lord remembers us and will bless us. Psalm 115:11-12


Dear Brothers and Sisters,
Our week may hold things we would never choose of our own accord. Things we would give a thumbs down before they could invade uninvited. Our time on earth is like that. Truly nothing happens on earth without God's permission. All that comes our way must first pass through our Saviors nail-scarred hands to fulfill His purposes in us. We do not always welcome His will or love it and In the middle of a nettlesome trial we find ourselves grumbling or our mind racing with fear. If we love God's will, we will embrace it with thanksgiving turning the evil and the good into treasures! He alone redeems our sorrows and loses and the  things which are too hard for us, the things that hurt too much.... the things we cannot walk into let alone face, but for His Presence  and His strength. Are we not far more likely sidetracked trying to figure out His will and why He allowed certain things to wound us deeply? 


What prerogative inspires questioning God's motives? We are out of kilter when we go beyond asking 'why' to accuse Him of not caring, not being Love itself; all because we lack faith to trust Him. We who have trusted Him for salvation needs move on to trust Him daily. The disciples were crossing the sea and the Master was asleep when the tempest threatened to drown them. How could the Master sleep? It was not because He was exhausted, but because He was unafraid, He knew the end from the beginning. The disciples were, as we are, fearful. And from an earthly perspective things were out of control.  Hear the accusation in their words in Mark 4:37-38: 

And there arose a fierce gale of wind, and the waves were breaking over the boat so much that the boat was already filling up. Jesus Himself was in the stern, asleep on the cushion; and they woke Him and said to Him, "Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?"

Feel the cutting words... How deeply we wound our Savior when we accuse Him of indifference or weakness or of acting in any way which would contradict who He is. God is Love and cannot act outside of Who He is. Ever. Period.

Things are often not as they appear. The crucifixion did not appear to have love attached to it or be the fuse of Hope and forgiveness for a world, paying a sin-debt no one outside of Christ Jesus could pay. We see icons of 'love' in our society, the heart being the most common. I see the Cross as thee greatest symbol of Love ever. In the Good Friday service as I was meditating on this and giving thanks for who He is and what He did for me. My heart was filled with gratitude for life, in particular my sons. I wept as i thanked Him for sparing my son's life the day before. "Thank you for sparing my son's life, Abba." then in the holy instant following my words, in the quiet God disclosed Himself in contrast and my heart cried out,  "Oh Father, thank You for not sparing Your Son's life.. but giving Him to die for me."  It is hard to even remember this moment without tearing up. 

My son, an avid bicyclist, was out riding (Austin, TX) when a bee stung him in the face. He was near a park and headed to a bench. Sitting, head in hands a few people ask if he was ok and in his confusion He said he was... but he felt worse and his next conscious moment was two hours later. He called a friend while puking his insides out. He was experiencing anaphylactic shock.  Face, throat, tongue swelling etc. Why did my son live through what should have killed him? God spared my son's life to accomplish His purposes. God is good and His purposes beyond understanding. But the Truth is: God is good even if my son would have died. He is good always, there is nothing but goodness in Him! Aren't You ready to dance to such a sweet, unchanging Truth we could never invent? We do not have to fear the future He is already there. We do not have to fear the past.... He will redeem all things.

He is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in Him.  Psalm 92:15

This truth is such comfort and urges me to get on my face in thanksgiving.

O God, what do I see on every side, but your will that is being accomplished? Let it also be accomplished in me, Let me love it; let it make everything sweet. Let me bring my own will down to nothing. O God, may you be blessed in everything. Accomplish your will, Lord. It is yours to will and mine to give myself over completely. F.F.


Great and mighty God, whose name is the LORD Almighty,  great are your purposes and mighty are your deeds. Jer 32:18b-19


 He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Romans 8:32


Abba, my precious One, You who hold every breath, every future moment and redeem all things for Your will and purposes, I exalt You. Holy. Holy. Holy. Majestic One, Knower of every word before it is on my tongue, there is no God but You. The treasure of Your grace and Your living Word are the only True riches.  You alone lift me above all that would pull me down. You fill my heart with faith to trust You. Thank You. Although in this world You have promised us tribulations, You have overcome the world and have provided all I need to be abundantly satisfied in Christ Jesus. Oh That I would trust You for this and walk in faith and not wound You with my words of unbelief and fear. Change me! I lift my eyes to thee my beautiful Jesus and in your Name I lay this prayer before the throne. amen 


Have a blessed week dear ones,
az

Thank You for the Scars!

So we praise God for the glorious grace he has poured out on us who belong to his dear Son. He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins. Eph 1:6-7

When they came to a place called The Skull, they nailed Jesus to the cross. Luke 23:33

I have been crucified with Christ... Gal 2:20

My Sisters who know Christ as Savior,

How very precious you are to Him who is the Passover Lamb. As believers we rejoice in the Truth of His death to satisfy God's anger over our sin. Only a perfect sacrifice would be accepted by Jehovah. Yeshua, was the perfect Lamb of God who came to take away the sins of the world. He became sin for us, that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him! Hallelujah. 

A scar. Each human naturally carries their scar from birth.  The testimony of the scar is an uncompromising reminder that we were utterly vulnerable and dependent on another's life. Someone carried us, nurtured us and gave us life.  Nurture flowed through the umbilical chord sustaining life in us. Our belly-button, or navel if you prefer, is the scar marking where I was separated and my life began. Life being a gift.

 Spiritually, life begins at the Cross, a scar on the landscape of history, reflecting man's worst evil perpetrated on the sinless, perfect Son of God, reminding us He carried all our sin, died in our place to give us life. Out of His death and resurrection came our forgiveness and cleansing and new Life; as all our sin was placed on Him on the Cross (not 'a' Cross but the cross). The Cross the lifeline between a Holy God and us, my sisters! His blood the payment, the embryonic fluid protecting us, keeping us! The Cross our symbol. Every human bears their physical scar as a testimony of life given. His cross reminds us of our utter dependence on this new life in Christ Jesus because of our daily ongoing need! 

Every humble and devoted believer in Jesus Christ must have his own periods of wonder and amazement at the mystery of godliness- the willingness of the Son of Man to take our place in judgement so that the people of God could be cleansed and spiritual people. A.W.T.

Though many believers rejoice over Christ's dying for them, few are affected by the fact He arose for them! There will be a constant struggle and failure unless we grasp this liberating Truth. I think of it like this: Christ removed every barrier which separated me from God: my guilt, my sin, (Romans 6:7) the law, Also He dealt our enemies a deadly blow- the world, the flesh and the devil. What He did there is what counts eternally! Because of this we are no longer in bondage through fear (we are free from the curse) and can boldly approach the throne of Grace. (Heb 4:15-16)  Our heart is free to study Him, to behold Him. I have to stop and sing praise to Him and worship, then shout: Hallelujah!

Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: “Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree.” Gal 3:13

Let us enter into all that which being united to Christ as our Life means. Let us rejoice in all that was accomplished for us on Calvary. L.L.L.

So many whose lips God lovingly created and were shouting 'Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest' as He entered Jerusalem on a colt, but were soon crying “Crucify Him, crucify Him”! How fickle the human heart! O that God would give us undivided hearts, grateful and overflowing in thankfulness for all His death and life provided. The over flow of our hearts will be Worship. 

Savior, Lamb of God, You, who hung between heaven and earth, suspended in humility.... I bow. I am on my face before You. Who You are terrifies me and draws me near. Your precious blood is power. Fill my heart with faith to trust You fully and daily deny myself and take up my cross and follow You as I choose (with my will) to reckon myself dead to sin and alive to You. Inner peace exists not in my flesh, but in my will... trusting You to take me through hardships specifically designed to conform me to the image of the Lord Jesus. I rejoice in your faithfulness. In You I find strength to rejoice when I would so easily grumble and feel it my right to be upset over things. I want to please You. Thank You for acepting me. I pray in the most Holy Name of Jesus, amen.

Crucified with Christ, risen with Christ! Hallelujah, I rejoice

az

The Music of Suffering

 After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you. I Peter 5:10


God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear Psalm 46:1-2a


Love you my Sisters who Jesus calls by name, 


Platitudes. Pain uninvited. Burdens that linger as unwelcome as a stray dog who claims your yard as his own. Physical pain readily exposes the emptiness of pat answers, clearing our vision and unstopping our ears.


History has borne out the truth that those who God uses greatly He has allowed to be hurt deeply. We would change this truth if we could! Eternal things, wrought by His Spirit through His servants, correspond to the wine press, the grapes crushed under foot in agony of spirit. Have you not found that anything worthwhile in your life, worth sharing to help others, has been birthed from suffering? Through which you have come to know the heart of the One who allowed it and who loves you beyond  your ability to fathom. You walk in a faith-trust today which is the direct result of suffering and have proved your Father absolutely faithful. Though unaware at the time, you were being transformed and your faith strengthened! 


"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus... Heb 12:2 


"However great our suffering, his was far greater." RA


Suffering is a dance partner i did not request or have opportunity to refuse. A simple arthroscopic surgery on my knee (torn meniscuses) has brought an unwelcome dance partner. We move in a slow jerky, out of step waltz. I am unable to kneel and i 'sit' a lot with an ice-wrap the size of a cantaloupe around my knee. No driving so far or  running or elliptical and dancing while i cook is off my 'to do' list. A week of intense pain before the surgery, preceded by 2 months of moderate pain, was wearing, yet only a precursor to this past month of daily pain. Questions raced through my mind... what do people do who have intense pain, deep loss or serious health issues? What if i were Japanese and had physical and crippling emotional pain... day after day? Unable to take any meds for pain, not even ibuprofen or arnica. Zip. I have the blessing of ice packs for which i am very grateful. My prayer is 'LORD, do not let me miss anything You have for me". Along with reminding myself whining and self-pity are not fruits of the Spirit nor acceptable 'sin'.


The essential consideration is that our Father be glorified in all His dealings with and for us. MJS


And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed; II Cor 9:8


This is a power verse! Let it fill your heart and mind. Make it personal. Why not memorize it and tuck it into your arsenal? God makes no mistake and has put you into a specific crucible to burn up what He sees needs to go. All to accomplish his will creating the likeness of Christ Jesus in you. What an opportunity to trust Him. Many think victory is having their circumstances righted. No!  Such thinking is but a spirit of entitlement. Who are we to dictate to an all-wise, Creator God, what we see as the right thing! Does God need our help? This would be humorous if it were not so sad. Common arrogance from our sinful flesh. God is God and we are not.  Hold still under His hand. Choosing to 'trust God' is a choice of our 'will' and requires dying to self. We are welcome to 'ask' Him for what we would like from a heart tuned to welcome His answer whether or not it is what we desire. He will make you more than a conquerer and lift you up to deeper dependence on Him. Rejoice that you are in Christ. Stop dwelling on the 'why' and ask 'what do You want to teach me Lord?'


I bow, before You who turned toward the Cross. Toward suffering... for me. I am in awe of who You are sweet Jesus. You are Lord of all, my God, my Constant, my Purpose, my Sanity, my Life-Breath and Keeper of my heart, Provider and Truth Teller. You who love me without condition or for any reason i can understand have made a way for me to know You more and more intimately. Your Word says what ever suffering You allow has great  purpose. (Jer 32:19) Thank You for being a God who redeems my sorrows and sufferings to benefit me, giving me hope and Your name glory. Let me share you with someone who needs to know these Truths about You so they may be set free to live Truth in Christ. I love you so imperfectly tho my heart wants to love You well. I pray this in Jesus precious name, Him whose hands and heart were never in conflict, amen.


hugs and prayers to all my sisters, (following is one of my favorite poems)
az

Set to the Music of Spheres

Pain is a partner I did not request;

This is a dance I did not ask to join;

whirled in a waltz when I would stop and rest.

Jolted and jerked, I ache in bone and loin.

Pain strives to hold me close in his embrace;

If I resist and try to pull away 

His grasp grows tighter; 

closer comes his face; 

hotter his breath. 

If he is here to stay 

Then must I learn to dance this painful dance,

Move to its rhythm, keeping my lagging feet

In time with his. Thus have I a chance

To work with pain, and so my pain defeat.

Pain is my partner. If I dance with pain

Then may this wedlock be not loss but gain. 


Madeleine L’Engle